I came across this little story a couple days ago. A friend (let’s call her Jenova) was given a chance to go on an overseas trip for work for a couple weeks. I don’t know about other people, but an overseas trip sponsored by the company definitely counts as a boon in my knowledge bank. But things weren’t so simple. The chance to go overseas occurred because Jenova’s male colleague asked for her to be sent together with him. After some deliberation with the boyfriend/fiance/husband (i’m not sure which since i don’t really know when that was), Jenova gave up the overseas opportunity.
Perhaps there is more of the story that i did not hear about, but from the surface of it, after hearing the bit that i did hear, the thing that gnawed at me was; where’s the trust? If it was Jenova’s fiance’s initiative to deny his fiancee the opportunity to travel overseas on company’s expenses, its signifies a lack of trust. If it was Jenova who initiated the decision to give up the opportunity, it signifies Jenova’s lack of trust in her fiance trust. But of course, there is a third option; the couple simply didn’t trust Jenova’s colleague.
Which ever the case, i still find it disheartening to hear the story. For the story was not unique. In fact, over the years, i’ve heard quite a number of similar stories. The people might be different, the events might be different, but they all have a common denominator, which is the possibility that it is all due to a lack of trust. Why marry if you’re not going to trust your spouse?
This trust issue, i suspect, is the reason why people who were once close to me tend to distance themselves and disappear after they become attached.
Anyway, after i exclaimed “How come no trust de?” the question was tossed at me. Would i allow my wife to go on an overseas trip with a cute boy?
It is indeed a weird question to ask me. But then again, not many people know of my polyamoric philosophy. That is, i will not demand a requirement of sexual exclusivity from my girlfriend or wife. So if my wife came to me and said that her company was sending her on a trip where she can have sex for a couple weeks with this cute boy she’d been eyeing, i would wish her bon voyage and to have fun.
r u talking abt me? i trust u =)
Eh? Which bits?
This trust issue, i suspect, is the reason why people who were once close to me tend to distance themselves and disappear after they become attached.
Ah yes. It does refer to you. But not you specifically. More of you as a group of similar people.